How do you become confident if you are a very shy person?
特別膽小的人怎么變自信?

 

獲得74.7k好評的回答@James Haforlarin:

1.I really desired confidence and was ready to give anything to have it- it all starts with this burning desire to want to be something more. I was going to be confident no matter what or I die trying!
1.我真的渴望獲得自信,并準備好了為之付出一切——一切都源于你想達到某種目的的強烈愿望。只要能自信,無論付出什么代價,就算是死我都愿意試試。

2.I read lots of books on self-confidence and motivation alone- I have a lot of knowledge now that all came together from a large amount of books. When you combine the ideas from a wide range of authors, you get something better.
2.我自己讀了大量關于自信和動力的書——我現在從大量書中學到了很多東西,把各種作者的思想結合在一起,你能從中獲益。

3.I stayed away from them- you know them right? All those negative people who see the world as a prison, those who only spreads epic awfulness everywhere, all those who always make you feel uncomfortable and undervalued. In short, I ran away from them. I changed where I lived and my life got better….
3.我遠離他們——你知道是誰吧?所有那些把世界看作監獄的人,那些只會到處傳播超級負能量的人,所有那些總是讓你不爽讓你看輕自己的人。簡言之,我遠離他們,我搬了家,現在生活好多了。

4.I got support- I had my uncle family who helped me through it and several friends I met at seminars and workshops.
4.我得到了支持——我叔叔一家人以及我在研討班和補習班遇到的幾個朋友都幫我度過了難關。

5.I made my decisions final- the thing with shyness is that you make decisions to act and then you break it. Meanwhile, each time you break this little commitments, your self esteem drops. What I did was to make my decisions final. I don't say I want to approach a girl and back out. No. I made sure I was forced to act every time.
5.我做了決定就不改——膽小帶來的一個后果就是你決定要采取行動之后又會反悔,同時每次你毀掉這個小小的承諾時你的自尊都會受損。我所做的就是做出決定就不改,我不會說了想追某個女孩然后又把話收回。不,我確保每次都強迫自己去采取行動。

6.I acted it out like Hollywood- It's really true that if you just start smiling and walking like a superman like I did then,you'd get superconfident in no time. I remember how I suddenly start speaking slowly, walking deliberately and always having that cool smile on. I'll maintain eye contact with everyone and spread out. With time I became addicted to this confidence acting. It became part of me.
6.我的行為舉止都模仿好萊塢——真的,如果你像我以前一樣開始模仿超人笑和走路的話,你馬上會變得超級自信。我還記得那時突然開始放慢語速,放慢步速,臉上總是帶著那種酷酷的笑。我會和每個人保持眼神接觸,雙臂攤開,慢慢地我迷上了這種自信的表現,它變成了我的一部分。

7.I started living with purpose- I realize I've really been on a high self esteem lately because of the control I bring to my life. I live everything in my life to purpose. Simply because I have goals in every aspect of my life and I've made the agreement to do my best in every situation. I've been sleeping better and my self love and self respect as been higher than ever. I don't blame myself for any mistakes because I know I did my best. I'm always glad with myself. This is the holy grail of self confidence and self esteem for me.
7.我開始為生活設定目標——我最近發現自己真的信心滿滿,因為我開始掌控自己的生活,生活中的一切都有目標。僅僅因為生活各方面都目標明確,我決定要在各種情況下都盡最大努力。我睡得更香了,比以前更愛也更尊重自己了,我不再因為任何錯誤責備自己,因為我知道自己盡力了。我總是為自己感到高興,對我而言這就是自信和自尊的最高境界。

So now I am feeling so happy.
所以現在我很開心。

 

(翻譯:菲菲)